Wow. Sounds like your boss is really being a jerk. I was pretty lucky, because I was the boss, but my Board was very understanding and wonderful. (I was director of a small public library.). Isn't great, though, the way the kids and parents welcomed you! It's interesting that people, even though many of them are sympathetic and kind, don't understand the aftereffects of this horrible disease. They think, OK, you had surgery and treatments and now you should be all better. I know that I didn't know anything about oral cancer until I got it.
Hang in there, John, you can always vent here. We are all here for you!

Some of this is just getting over the trauma and the diagnosis... it's still very fresh. Whatever they do or don't do it doesn't matter... do what you have to do to recover. and be kind to yourself. you deserve it. take care and hugs.

Thank you guys for your support. Things just seem to be escalating with my boss. Because yesterday I was at work for half a day instead of just a few hours more parents wanted to catch up with me and boss seemed irritated and annoyed that I was sharing with them in a professional manner what actually happened and correcting her telling them I went on vacation. And yesterday she threw it in my face that I spoke to human resources so I informed her that apparently I need to call them again and see if I get any results from a second phone call.
Never in a million years did I ever think me having cancer and having major surgery to remove it would garner this kind of reaction from my boss.

Fight for your rights - I wouldn't be hurt at this point I'd be pissed!

Hi John,
I taught preschool for many years as well as operated a Home day care. If it is at all possible, remember your kiddos. They love you and need you and I'm sure are thrilled to have you back. Go in, do your thing, hand parents your phone number if they want to talk and just explain that it has been requested you don't speak of it on company time or on the premises. Your boss is going to be the one looking like a fool in the end. If HR knows she is giving you a hard time about going to appts, they will know that is harrasment and most likely she will be warned and possibly terminated if it continues. If there is no HR, call the Labor Board. I'm sure it will spark GREAT interest.
There is definitely SO much ignorance out there. Kevin has his first PET on the 12th and between me and all of you, because he doesn't read the forums much, I am nervous as heck. This constant yuck in my stomach and really, just on again off again crying fear. Fighting all of that and keeping it private because to all our families, we are done. He's back to work and life is normal. We all know the drill.
Anyway, we are here for you and feel for you. This person sounds as if she has some pretty serious insecurity issues and you are her target to give her power right now. DONT let her have that on you. Just smile and move on if possible! I know the preschool route though, and it can be pretty hard when there is tension in the air. The kids know..... Love them and play!!!!!!
Kathy

Thanks Kathy. Most of the parents think age is a lunatic now because she told them I was on vacation and the parents look like they've been slapped in the face when I tell them no, I was actually battling cancer. The kids are the only redeeming factor of my job and some of their reactions to my returning have touched my heart in a way I'll never forget.
I've learned from all of this, on some level, that my time here could be up at any moment and life is fragile and I just need to be thankful for each moment I'm given and do my best to make the most of those moments. My battle with cancer has stripped away a lot of those life pretensions that rule so many people's life and I can't give my boss the power to steal even a fraction of those moments.
Like last night- my favorite band had a show locally and played/dedicated a song just for me and they came over and talked to me about all I was going thru and shared their own experiences. These are the kind of moments my life needs to be centered on. And you guys are all right. I can't lend her any of those moments.

Good for you, John. Sounds like you are on the right track! People that try to give you grief are at all levels of teaching and they just dig themselves into a hole. I had one who was a problem for everyone in many different departments and the day she left (or was "encouraged" to) was widely celebrated. Teaching has so many rewards - just seeing the light in a child's eyes - even at university level, when they've understood something or succeeded in a task is awesome! Celebrate and recognize all the beautiful moments that come your way! Do the happy dance with your kids!

So glad you're back on track! Onward and upward!

Well got a call from an oncology office today and apparently my doctor/surgeon wants me to pursue radiation and I'm so scared and upset. I don't know if it's really worth all that I'll lose

John, radiation is NOT the end of the world! It is of course your own personal decision. My own opinion is that its always a good idea to try to hit it with everything you can so hopefully you do not ever have to deal with it again.

Ive seen alot of people come thru here. Some go thru rads and its no big deal. They have about a 5 month spell where they arent 100% and then its pretty much right back to their old lives. A year later you would never know they were sick at all. This is of course not everyone. You probably have seen alot of horror stories about radiation. Just remember everyone is different. The better your nutrition and hydration the easier you will have it.

Nest wishes with whatever you decide.