Thank you for all the thoughts and suggestions. I am sure I would have put off some of the calls I made today if it wasn't for you guys.

I talked to the MO office and basically asked the question "How long?". It was a good conversation, somewhat shocking but I feel that I would rather know than put things off until too late. I know that things are still too early to know much (how fast it is spreading, what treatment can be done, we may know better after next weeks scan) but really wanted to get their opinion. Was told that typically when these metasis' occur, would estimate 10 months to a year. In her favor, the spots are small and with treatment can possibly be held at bay for years.

Armed with that info, called her retirement plan and inquired about disability and was told to not wait to file paperwork, get it in even if it needs to be refiled later. Will also make the call to SSDI tomorrow to get that in motion.

She has been being treated at the UofM-Fairview and she has been happy with treatment there. I think I will check with our insurance to see what is necessary to get a second opinion at the Mayo. It is only about a half hour further away.

I know that this past year has been a mixed blessing that I feel guilty about. We have been married 23 years and like most marriages have had good and bad times but have spent more time together, laughed and talked more during the last year than probably the previous 5 years.

Sue, I am still getting through your posts and Liz, I believe it was while I was reading through your experiences with Robin (if I am not mixed up, particularly the part where you took the dog to see him) that made me step back for awhile. My heart goes out to both of you with what you have had to deal with.

I know this isn't the most upbeat topic on here but what you have shared in your posts is probably one the main reason I come here, to find some insight, guidance, and sharing of the grief and pain.

Thank you all.