Ija, you are right, as a caregiver it is hard to admit how difficult it can be. The first two months following surgery, I felt totally out of it, dead tired all day long, then after getting my wife to bed at night, would try to find answers on this website leaving me more and more tired. One thing that has helped the last two weeks has been getting a feeding pump so that we could get down to just two feeding during the day. It has freed up time so that I could get back to work, keep up with the kids and laundry. Also, my wife has taken over some of the responsibility for some of her medications and hooking up a feeding from time to time. I do feel somewaht guilty but I think it also is important that my wife has a purpose to get up and be active during the day. I am sure there will be days (like today) where she is not up to doing to much but by her taking care of some of it over the last week, I feel fresh and able to give her plenty of attention. I would suggest trying night feedings with a pump if possible.

I know it can be difficult turning some of the resposibility over to your husband or my wife for their care after seeing them so vulnerable but there are things they are able to do that can make a big difference. Hopefully this doesn't sound too selfish but there you are not only doing the job of being his caregiver but you also have to deal with all the emotional issues of your husbands illness. Good luck to you and your husband.