Ija,
Believe me, you are very normal. As much as you love your hubby and want to be a good caregiver, it takes a lot out of you. We are one year out from Bill's last treatment, and I am just now crawling out of the tunnel and feeling back to normal...(just in time for everything else around to blow up!)
You do need to take care of yourself...eat, sleep and get out a little (I would go fun shopping while Bill was having chemo - kept me sane.) I noticed for sure by 9:00 at night that I was done...wanted to be left alone, couldn't handle lots of aggravation and I would be very happy that Bill was in bed asleep. By morning, and after a good nights sleep, I would be ready to take care of him. So watch out when you feel very down or scared, or just negative....you may just need to rest or sleep.
Deb