Thanks for answering - I am doing better today because Paul is having a good day - guess this is what they mean by good days/bad days - he is almost his old self. I called and demanded the nurse come out - she came yesterday and we had a long talk. She convinced Paul that he needed to put the Fentenyl patch back on and he has not shown any side effects. Guess this is the good/bad news part - the horrible weekend was not the drugs, so the cancer must have mets to his brain. When he was Dx this time they doctor told him - "don't worry, it's a slow growing cancer". Maybe to him, but it's damn fast to us! No, I have no family and his is still on the East coast so there is no one here to help. Funny, last year we found out he has an aortic aneurysm and I wandered through the days worried it would rupture - now I'm not so sure it would be a bad thing. (Boy, does alot of guilt go with saying that!) The hospice has decided they need to send a home health aide and volunteer once a week from now on, so maybe that will help. They also (finally) mentioned they have a 5 day respite program where he can go in the hospital and I can recover - now I just have to work up my nerve to talk it over with Paul. He will not be happy. Again, thanks for listening. If you don't mind I'd like to write to you occasionally - let me know if it's okay. My phone #=405-701-0199. Jennifer