Michele, I don't think YOU can change your husband's attitude- he will have to run that base alone. You can share what you believe, what you have learned from this cancer experience and what you hope to see as the life the 2 of you will share going forward. But, in reality, it is up to him to learn how to assimilate and deal with all that he has endured during this. That will not be an easy thing for him to do. And the same goes for you- As a caregiver for someone you love, you have been through Hell and it isn't over yet. You are gonna have to try hard to take care of your own mental and physical health as well. I hope you are strong and I hope if you need help, you will seek it out. I'm pulling for you. Amy