Shar,
Sorry to hear what your baby is facing, and your fears....you could twist it and see that you have made it through all the BS, and you are a 1 year survivor. As for the crazy ex-girlfriend-wouldn't worry, 16.5 years is a bit much. You are the one he chose to be with and still does. She knows this. I just wouldn't engage. Too much else on your plate to deal with.
email me is you want to talk more about this.
Will be thinking about all of you.
D

Donna
CG to Mom, dx 4/25/07 with tongue cancer,T3N0,tx began 7/6/07, 31 tx's of IMRT, 8 cycles of Erbitux. Brachytherapy, surgery, left neck dissection and temp trach placed all on 9/17/07, trach removed 10/17/07. ORN of jaw, late effect of radiation symptoms. **lost my beautiful mother on 5/5/11.