I don't know how to fully express the fondness and caring that I feel for each of you. Your kind words and support have carried me these past few days, and I am so happy to have good news to share.

My dad seems to have turned that dark corner. He is doing so well! The flap that was thought to have died is only superficial, and the reconstructive surgeon said yesterday that he thinks he can correct it under local anesthesia as an outpatient in his office. The trach size was reduced yesterday and he was able to talk some. He wrote that he was afraid that he would never walk again. He is now working up to the six laps around the hall per day that they want from him. I call it his walk for coffee! He wants coffee very much! Dr. said a couple more days! Dad also wrote that not being able to communicate for the first couple of days was horrible.

This situation has been compounded by my step mom, who made two horrific scenes in front of my dad, one she directed at me (not unusual), because I was sharing songs that my dad asked for on my sons ipod. She has always been jealous, though I have never understood why. She has a 26 year history of being more awful than Cinderella's step mom. The second scene she made in front of my dad was directed at an RN who was rated top notch at Cleve Clinic. My dad had to deal with this 2 days post surgery. He now openly says that she is mean, jealous, and a bully. Since her second outburst, Dad has finally laid down the law. My step mom will never again be permitted to exclude me from his life and to bully me and my son. We are beginning to have those heart to heart talks that were denied to us prior to the surgery. It breaks my heart, because I so want to bring calm, peaceful energy to my dad to recover fully. I would never have wanted this to happen while he had to deal with his recovery. But it seems to have made him want to fight back! His fighting spirit is alive and well, a spirit I don't think I've seen so strong from him in 26 years. I have to admit it is a blessed relief for me, I believe he will choose to make changes in 2008 to make his life as happy and peaceful as possible. These changes are long over due. I love my dad with all my heart and soul, and after losing my mom 10 years ago to alcoholism, it renews my spirit to have such hope that he and I can have the kind of relationship I have always wanted to have but was denied with him.

You were all right in so many ways, that the drains and stuff would be taken out, the physical wounds will heal, and that love and heart to heart talks will begin to heal the emotional wounds as well. I am so grateful, and relieved. Now I can turn my attention to my son who will turn 18 on Thursday. I have felt so lost and gloomy not knowing how my dad would do through this. Now I feel I can open the curtains, bring in the light and life again to our home. Thanks again to each one of you who helped me through this darkness. I am forever indebted.


Deb