Mandi,
I hope you can distance yourself if this doesn't work out. Tough love is tough to do but a must. I am an alcholic in recovery. I speak from my heart when I say it's up to him. He has to bottom out and be prepared if you do hang in there. Sometimes a dry drunk is worse than the drunk one. Fortunately I didn't become one but many do.You've given so much already. Please think of yourself and the boys.
Take care
Diane