Margaret -
I read your post and just want to give you a hug. The months from diagnosis to end of radiation were tough - but the months after the radiation treatments stopped were harder. I nearly lost Kenny twice -- once to surgical complications, the other to depression (suicide).

Kenny grew up thinking that men should hide their feelings and just 'work through it'. And the depression hit him like a ton of bricks.

Kenny is the most 'anti-drug' guy you would ever want to know. Hates even taking an aspirin.
But he now takes Effexor once a day and swears it saved his life.

I was the one that told the MO to prescribe Kenny anti-depressants. The first ones (Paxil) really did not work. After talking with our family doc, Kenny was switched to a different type of anti-depressant and it certainly helped.

I will echo what Gary states about ending treatments. At least by going to the RO we felt we were 'fighting' the cancer. We were doing something tangible to battle cancer.

Once we reached this point we both thought -- "ok, we made it". Boy were we wrong. Kenny was either sleeping of dealing with the terrible mucous problems post radiation. Actually the sleep helped him a lot. Think about it -- his body has to completely heal and re-build his throat. That takes rest and nutrition.

A final note -- keep yourself healthy (both mentally and physically). My depression wasn't something I was ready to deal with - but I learned that I had to keep going for Kenny. Make sure you take care of yourself!

Carol