Hi Liz, Sorry to hear that Rob's having such a rough time and want to echo what Amy is saying about the abdominal PEG tube. It was the only way that Jack could take the medication, food and water during treatments. If I'm doing my math conversion right, that's a lot of weight that he's lost in a short period of time.

It is going to be a long series of weeks for both of you and you will need to find the inner strength to get through this. The uneasy silence is mutual fear, and it's terrible but temporary. Keep telling yourself that this will get better. You didn't choose cancer, it came uninvited into your lives and of course you need to find a way to deal with it for the long haul. But right now it's all about the physical pain and symptoms Rob is having and getting control of that.

Jack did end up in the hospital during treatments because he developed an infection. It isn't a bad thing if that happens to Rob because they have the ability/equipment to handle his care, and they'll be motivated to resolve it and send him on his way.

When he gets the PEG tube they will probably teach you to pour the liquid in by gravity - just letting it drip into the PEG tube. Jack couldn't tolerate that during treatments and we had them give us something called the kangaroo bags with tubing that hung from an IV pole so we could regulate the drip and go more slowly. You may want to ask them about it particularly if he has nausea. The main thing is that he gets the PEG tube put in and gets started on using it.

When you're in as much pain as Rob is that's the only thing you have any ability to see. His feelings are normal and appropriate to the situation. Hopefully the patch will control the pain and he'll be less miserable. I hate everything about this treatment, but especially the part where I had to stand by and watch the person I love most suffer with no power to fix it. Remember that you are helping Rob just by being his voice and being tuned into his symptoms. YOU CAN DO THIS. You're already doing this by taking on the doctors and standing up for the care Rob needs.

A day will come when this will be over. In the meantime hang in there, you're doing great.

Regards JoAnne