There are many things going on that can all seem small by themselves but put them together with facing cancer, battling the brutal treatments, and worrying about an uncertain future these things can easily become a cause for depression. Of course on top of everything else, he probably isnt feeling much like himself right now.

One major thing that I always tell our members is focus on what is within your control. His intake plays a much bigger role than you can imagine. If your husband isnt taking in at least 2500 calories and 48-64 oz of water every single day then he will not be feeling very good. Has he been losing weight? That is a sure sign he needs to up his intake. I know its not easy to do when going thru rads/chemo but it is the single most important thing he can do to help himself get thru this easier. If he is able to push to take in even higher calories like 3000 or 3500 it will only help make everything easier.

I also suggest seeking out a professional at the treatment center. Im sure you husband (and you as well) are probably a bit overwhelmed by everything going on. It would greatly benefit him to talk with someone experienced with dealing with cancer patients, he may also need anxiety meds to get him thru treatments and recovery. If you suggest it he may not want to hear it but if a professional who he doesnt know advises anxiety meds he probably would be more open to trying it.

If you havent done so already, contact the American Cancer Society and start the ball rolling on getting a volunteer driver. Yes, there are volunteers who drive those distances. I had a couple drivers take me to treatments and back home on my 45 minute commute to my treatment center. On my volunteer driver days, it was like the weight of the world was off my 17 year old sons shoulders. Just one day here and there for someone else to drive him would make a huge difference to you both. You could go to work without having to worry about your husband. I know I greatly enjoyed meeting other cancer survivors who were my drivers. It helped give me the hope I could make it thru the treatments and recover and go on to have a decent life after cancer. Those volunteers had no idea how important spending time with them was to me when I was in the dark days of rads/chemo treatments.

There all kinds of small things that can make a big difference and change a patients (and caregivers) perspective into a more positive way of thinking. The few I mentioned I know for certain they would help you both. These are the things that helped me get thru the terrible treatments and my recovery. I hope they can also benefit you and your husband. And yes, I do think your husbands doctors should be made aware of everything you have told us. They need to help him to get thru the treatments and Im sure they have seen others who have gone thru the same issues. Maybe its his medications that are making him depressed or maybe worrying about if the cancer will be eliminated could be whats bothering him. Ive noticed over the years, many male patients suffer silently with these problems. Its a good thing they have great caregivers by their side to help them over the hurdles.

Its ok to lean on us when the going gets tough. We have been there and know how bad it is and what can make a difference in helping to see this in a better light.

Best wishes with everything!!!