Thank you all for the great replies.

Paul, i am looking into ssdi but they pretty much say since she is retired it doesn't apply. She has almost 2.5 More years until she is eligible for medicare. She will have subsidized insurance takes in $175 a year too much for medicaid welfare though. The hospitals just wouldn't schedule any scans or biopsies until it is all completely approved. They have now scheduled a pet scan for 10-8 on the supposition that it will go through. Both hospitals did have really good financial planning centers, coordinating with the state s insurance, etc. They have it flagged for rush but i guess it has to follow all the steps. Anyway, i think it will be fine the delays were just really hard to take. She does own outright a condo that we can sell but again, it's just a time thing.

David, i too was very surprised that 2 different oncologists immediately said surgery after seeing an endoscopy. In my experience a dr rarely says anything until they see test results even my best friend's dr wouldn't say anything and she had pancreatic cancer. I suppose this is one of the things that lead me to believe it's very bad. No, they have not said if they felt anything in her lymph nodes/neck though one of the doctors said it was most likely also in the esophagus.

We do have some of the country's best cancer centers in the boston area. After we know everything we need to know and the insurance is all set, i may look into taking her to the dana farber cancer institute for her treatment. 20 Yrs ago my brother had lymphoma and they cured him.

Lol charm no, i do not see anything wrong with a drink or 2 or 10 to get you, me or anyone else through this. Just not for her. Uh not that i in any way equate me with any of you. Not at all! But in her case, drinking is more than likely what got her into this mess and i know if she could figure out a way to get it past the tumors, she would be drunk and saying she hadn't had a drink since april. No, that's not for her. In my happiest little fantasies, they do the scans, say they were confused and they meant a great big canker not a cancer, but marie got scared enough that she never drinks again and i have the wonderful functioning, fun sister again instead of me being the mean mother, cleaning up messes she leaves wherever she goes and wanting to punch her in the head every other day. Sigh...I wish. Ahhh cancer the great equalizer. Now we are simply sisters again and I am only remembering who she used to be to me many, many years ago.

Thank you all. I want her to fight and i keep using all of you as examples that you can win the battle if you fight. She says she has gained two pounds so i'm hoping that's true my nagging about drinking shakes and ensure and eggs might be working. I have learned so many useful things from you in the last few days. Thank you again for your help.