I think that if I saw my kids every day it might have been different. My daughter lives the closest, but even she is about 45 minutes away, but she was available when I needed her. My son is actually 4 hours away, so I didn't see him all that much, and when I did see him he was pretty shocked at my condition. I find that it has been helpful for me to talk with my friends who have gone through something similar, because even my husband who was with me constantly really has no clue exactly what I was experiencing. I have tried to be very direct with my kids without dwelling on it too much.

Female, nonsmoker, 70, diag. 5/09 after tongue biopsy: stage IV. Left hemi-gloss. and left selec. neck disec. 30 lymph nodes removed May 20. Over 7 weeks daily rads. with three chemo. PEG removed 12/4/09 Am eating mostly soft foods. Back to work 11/09 Retired 4/1/11. 7 clear scans! Port out 9/11. 2/13. It's back: base of tongue, very invasive
surgery involving lifestyle changes. 2/14: Now speaking w/Passey-Muir valve. Considering a swallow study. Grateful to be alive.