Yikes! Wow - maybe some of the fatigue is meds related? Your body has been through a lot. However the shoulder thing etc.. The only way to get past the shoulder arm neck thing is physio - seriously - frankly I didn't feel neck or arm pain perse - mostly numbness and stiffness - but physio helps a lot... It loosens up the scar tissue - helps return blood flow to the area - and range of motion and function. Also acupuncture breaks up the scarring as well. I'm almost 9 mos out of surgery 7 mos out of radiation (the 4th will be that mark for me) and I have full range of motion 80-90 % strength in my arm/shoulder... No pain, only some numbness and tightness which lessens daily! Push through it my friend and take a pain med if you need it. I'm like you - not a fan of pills, but if I needed a med I took it.

Also re the rads and chemo... If you are HPV + (cancer) you should probably have the chemo and rads as that is the primary treatment - plus it kills anything microscopic possibly left behind. I would definitely get a second opinion. The palate - I think it's normal for the tissue to recede - but I'm sure someone here will pipe up as there are a few members who've been through that surgery!!! Good luck, and hugs - you sound like you need one - heal well.