Eric,

Fear has a way of immobilizing people. Maybe your wife is afraid for you and for herself. Some people won't talk about things because they think verbalizing will make the worst come true. Unfortunately for them, they don't realize that talking about their fears is a good thing and can release lots of tension. She may be afraid to say something that she thinks will upset you. It is hard as a caregiver to deal with the pressure of saying the wrong thing. I am assuming she is your caregiver. If she isn't, well some people just can't do that. They don't have the confidence to do what needs to be done. I know you are the one with cancer and you have been to hell and back. As a caregiver or a spouse, it is easy to fall into the trap that one's worries, concerns and fears are NOTHING compared to what the patient has been through.

Therapy helped me. I was so mired in my husband's cancer care, I lost myself. I hope that you can both work this out. Go for yourself, at least.

All the best--
Anita