Linda and Linroth and JAM, Again I am insired! Thanks for all the responses and advise. You are right about life and being "normal". I am faced with news good or bad and the holidays. Its just kind of building up and I don't know how to do this. I am boycotting Christmas (buying presents). This is the first time I have done this and I don't know if I can pull it off. The bills are just too much and the job future is in question. This morning my voice was completely gone. Really frustrating! But there are people dealing with much worse! Merry Christmas to all of you out there with Chemo and radiation treatments and surgery. We will all make it!