Thank you so much for the kind words everyone, it was very nice to wake up this morning and read them. I am very grateful for OCF support.
KP5, I live in the DC area. And thank you for your advice.
To be completely fair, I did get invited by two out-of-town friends to go spend the holidays with them, but I really don't feel like traveling long distances in this condition, or like crashing their family reunions either. And also, a good number of my local friends (most in their 20's and 30's) will be flying elsewhere to spend the holidays with their families.
The interesting thing about my local friends is that, in the very beginning of this whole ordeal, they were amazing. Between the diagnosis and surgery, people called all the time. For two weeks after the surgery, when I was in lots of pain, they made a schedule to make sure somebody was with me all the time. About 10 of them rotated. I was moved to tears an thought that maybe it won't be that bad going through all of this if I had such a support system.
But then, once I recovered enough from the surgery to go back to work, things drastically changed. A couple of people still remained amazing support in every possible way, especially a friend who had her unemployed father come all the way from CT to drive me to my treatments - I will never be able to repay that for the rest of my life. But the rest, well, some texted once or twice in this two months, and some completely disappeared. I am especially disappointed with my so-called-best friend. She made grand claims how she was going to do this or that for me and ended up doing nothing. No visits or phone calls in these two months. Couple of texts, that is all.
I am also conflicted about my all feelings: I mean I should be (and am) grateful for all the help after the surgery but very hurt with the lack of contact now. It is very difficult to have those two opposing types of feelings for same people.
Urgh, looks I am turning this into a therapy session. Thanks for reading. And sending lots of hugs to everyone.
