COLLEEN, lol - you were writing while i was writing!!!!
i like the bell idea, finally a time i can actually get away with it : ) i know she is dying to help, perhaps i don't even have a choice but suppose i will give it a go. my boys are 4 and 7. they do know mommy has a boo-boo being taken out and was soooo upset when my older boy, ben, asked if i was going to die! i have been working hard since then to reinforce that this was not something for him to worry about. i am sure he picked up things, not to mention the feeling of our house in general and that makes me beyond sad. i was even thinking for now on in (besides quieter more private conversations) to perhaps not let him know when the actual surgery is until i am done in the hospital to alleve his worrying and let him enjoy himself at camp. the thought of his fear is far worse than my own. i am worried how this will effect us all and maybe my mom would be a good distraction (at the very least the house will be clean!) anyhow, will need someone to hand over the good drugs!!! my next appointment is the 11th with the surgeon and will get my surgery date then. feel like i am kinda living in short term. want to cram in as much summer as possible beforehand - not to mention eating everything i love... talk soon, hugs, marieka