Paula,
I'm sorry that you were hurt by your daughters reaction.
I have to tell you how impressed I am by reading that Jim went out to celebrate in light of all that he is going through. It says a lot for his feelings about you and your children. He may be difficult in dealing with his feelings about his tx's and such but it is plain to see that he has strong family values.
It's not an easy road that you both have to face but at least you have each other to lean on.
Donna