Hi Amanda,
A good place to get a lot of good information is in the "Getting through it project" (last topic) section under the "Draft Copy" posting where there is a link called "GTI Draft Copy". Here is the link
http://www.oralcancerfoundation.org/board_images/GTI_draft.pdf A 178 page pdf document will open up. I actually found it to be very informative and covers just about everything from beginning to end. I wish I found it before I started treatment. It has a table of contents at the beginning.
It is great that you can attend a lot of the doctor appointments. It is always good to have extra set of ears to pick up things others missed. I usually had my sisters go with me and my wife to the appointments because they picked up a lot of things and asked a lot of questions. Take notes.
To give you an idea, I was diagnosed on 05/21/07 and began radiation and chemo treatment on 06/25/07. In between that I had a PET scan, met with the ENT, medical oncologist, radiation oncologist, was fitted for my radiation mask, and went through a trial run on the radiation table. Things happened fast. I didn't have any surgery.
I hope this helps. Feel free to post any questions or concerns as we are here to help.