I wish I had a good answer to the morphine side effects. My brother went through the jerking too. He, too, would hit his head during violent jerks that increasingly occured during his sleep. We asked for different medication, but at the time the doctors didn't seem to be able to offer anything else. Thankfully, after his surgery he no longer needed the morphine and the jerking and hallucinations has stopped. (One quick funny...When he and his wife arrived in Houston the day prior to her surgery, he kept telling his wife to be careful because you didn't want to get arrested in Mexico. Fortunetly she was able to laugh at this.) I know it is stressful to watch him jerk and tremble and I feel for your mother and her concerns. I can't really offer any help, but just let her know they are not alone in this experience. Sometimes just that knowledge has helped me through the day.
My brother dipped snuff. My father still does. He continually tries to quit, but my mom and sister keep "catching him" taking a dip. He has seen what it has done to my brother and sometimes I actually think my dad is hoping he will get it too, a sort of punishment for introducing my brother to tobacco at a young age. I know he feels a lot of guilt for that. My sister is very angry and, rightly, feels my father is showing disrespect to my brother everytime he takes a dip. But bottom line, my father is 60 years old and it is time he take care of himself, just as your father should. We can only do so much. As for me, I am tired and my efforts are going to save my brother. If my father chooses to disrespect my brother and to the rest of the family as well that's his decision. We have our hands full and it is a selfish thing to give us (and you) more to worry about. I know my situation is not exactly like yours, because, in your case the cancer victim has resumed the habit, and I am the last person to tell someone what to do, but here I go anyway...Maybe if you showed your father you could quit he would be encouraged as well. I think if I were in his shoes and those around me continued to do the very thing that was killing me, I would be hurt and perhaps lash out as well. Also, second hand smoke cannot be that great for him either. I now addiction is a hard thing to face, but there are tougher things - just ask some of the people on this panel.
Best of luck and know we wish you strength and courage.
Tonya