Hi Lorie,
You are about at the place we are now. My husband finished treatment on October 31st. He also suffered severe burns and dehydration. He still gets most of his nutrition through his PEG tube, but is beginning to eat some soft foods. He had all his teeth removed so his diet is limited for now. On February 13th he will have a right neck dissection to remove his lymph nodes. After that we will be done!!

Everyone tells us caregivers to "take of yourself", but when it comes down to it we must take the initiative. My husband was away in Portland during the week receiving treatment, so I continued working. When people asked how I was doing I told the truth. On days that were difficult, I said so. Not everyone wants to hear that, but I felt better acknowledging my own feelings. On days I was doing OK, I also said so. Hearing that out loud made me feel even better.

I also sent out weekly updates by email to our friends and family so that everyone could hear the news at the same time and I would not have to spend time trying to get in touch with everyone.

I kept up my volunteer work as best I could, called friends for lunch or dinner, learned to go to the movies by myself, and wrote in a journal. Not only do I keep track of doctors, appointments, and procedures, but feelings, frustrations, highs and lows. As I looked back through it yesterday, I realized how far we have come since the day he was diagnosed. We have a long way to go, but now I know we can make it.

As for my husband, I give a lot of credit to the members of the local chapter of the VVA (Viet Nam Veterans of America). He had to give up his presidency of the chapter while he was in treatment, but since the day he came home they have included him in every event. They even pushed him in a wheelchair in the Veteran's Day parade just 5 days after he finished treatment! They really are my heroes.

The last bit of advice I have is to keep in touch with this website. I find a great source of comfort and inspiration.
Take care, Cindy