All your questions sound like you are well prepared for your appointments.

What exactly did is the mass? A biopsy should get to the bottom of what the mass is. Pre-cancer is NOT what the majority of our members have... squamous cell carcinoma which can be a very aggressive or invasive cancer.

I know this is completely overwhelming to you. Since you already have a team of mental health professionals please reach out to them to help get you thru everything you are dealing with. The anxiety and depression can be debilitating for some people and it MUST be addressed to enable you to move past this health scare. We're ALL our own worst enemies and always hardest on judging ourselves. When feeling down reach out to your mental health professionals and try whatever techniques they suggest, it sure cant hurt. Same goes with meds... if it helps to make you feel better and enables you to deal with things then its worth a try. But it can be weeks before you notice any improvement which goes back to the mental health pros again to help you create a strategy for those low times. Another idea Im certain you would benefit from would be to find and join an online support group for mental health issues. Unfortunately without years of medical school, clinical patient experience, someones full medical history and the patient right in front of us to ask questions of (not that we have the proper knowledge or training anyway) its not possible to be able to help with this sort of thing.

To be completely honest with you... Most OCF members have been thru some horrendous things, their families have as well. Its not always easy for those of us here who have been thru cancer (some several times... Ive had it 3x myself and suffer from a great many physical challenges on a daily basis). Being forced to face real life and death situations makes it difficult to fully grasp everything someone who doesnt have cancer goes thru.with their much less serious medical issues. Im not trying to downplay your feelings or situation, Im sure what you are going thru is awful. Hopefully your mental health pros will be able to help you develop coping skills to better manage your mental health challenges.

I hope you can try to see your situation in a different perspective... you really are very, VERY fortunate!!! Everyone here who has been thru OC, treatments and a seemingly never ending recovery would trade places with you in a second for the opportunity to go back to how they were before cancer, even if its only for a day or a couple hours. I sure would!!! Id eat and eat and then eat some more of all my former favorite foods, desserts too. Its been so long since I went anywhere without being stared at every place I go. I forget what its like to be a regular healthy person instead of being disfigured and left with debilitating life long side/after effects.... I sure wouldnt waste one minute of being my whole self (before cancer) again Id go out in public and do all the things Im no longer able to do swimming, rock climbing/hiking, etc.

Hopefully you will see you really are a very fortunate person with so many positive things going for them. Focus on what is within your control and do your very best to avoid the negatives. Best wishes with all the tests and whatever else you have arranged to get to the bottom of your mouth issues.
I hope you are in a good place mentally and all the physical issues will resolve on their own.

Best wishes!!!

SCC 6/15/07 L chk & by L molar both Stag I, age44
2x cispltn-35 IMRT end 9/27/07
-65 lbs in 2 mo, no caregvr
Clear PET 1/08
4/4/08 recur L chk Stag I
surg 4/16/08 clr marg
215 HBO dives
3/09 teeth out, trismus
7/2/09 recur, Stg IV
8/24/09 trach, ND, mandiblctmy
3wks medicly inducd coma
2 mo xtended hospital stay, ICU & burn unit
PICC line IV antibx 8 mo
10/4/10, 2/14/11 reconst surg
OC 3x in 3 years
very happy to be alive smile