I was a caregiver so I have that perspective and will share.

I don't even have a relationship with mine so having to take care of someone who has treated me badly for a couple of decades was not my idea of fun. But I drove him most of the time and when I could not, I found someone else. I even had some drive to get a break along the way. I needed to get away from it all even for a couple of hours.

He constantly battled me saying I was overfeeding him (8 oz total) when I took over because he literally starved himself for 2 months and lost 60 lbs. Argued every single time, every single day. My stepson (his son) was there one morning and he pushed both of us over the edge. We walked out and said we were done. You can only take it for so long. That was about the end of radiation but his problems were feeding tube more than anything else and continued for months. So I let him take care of himself and refused to clean his syringes or do anything else. I did drive when he was being put under or had doctor's appt because the chemo really destroyed his mind for quite awhile.

I am so anxious about medical stuff and here I was in hospitals every single day listening to heavy duty info. But I was a trooper and am still dealing with the anxiety of being in those places. I had a horrible allergic reaction to all the chemicals coming out of his breath and body. I took a toll physically as well as mentally.

So at the end of it, what does he tell people? No one supported him during treatment. Well, buddy, I guarantee no one is going to if you go through this again after making that statement when he was given so many gift cards for gas, cash, drivers, etc.

Just telling my perspective hoping it helps someone who is on the other side.

For you, I would say find a friend you can depend on! I set up my support team of 5 good friends before treatment started. They took me for coffee, lunch, or just to listen and text/call and see how I was doing. Your husband may not be the strong person you need right now. Best wishes to you.....