Hi there - again. I'm in Toronto - I was treated at princess Margaret hospital by one of the top ENTs in the country - my tumor was 2.4 cm he removed 40 nodes even though my scans - 2 of them - were clear. It was a good call. I felt one pop up between the biopsy and surgery and one of the scans was after this thing popped up, anyway it came back cancerous and leaking into the surrounding tissue - which is what the pathology said.
Anyway as I said previously this particular cancer is treated with a resection, dissection and hen follow up rads and chemo if necessary.
Don't get freaked get educated, this will allow you to advocate for yourself. I hear you about your mom, I lost mine to lung cancer as well, got through my own treatment then spent the last 4 months taking my father in law for treatments at Pmh for esophageal cancer .. hugs - you will get through this.