Sorry you're going through this. You are carrying a heavy burden by not sharing with others. We need help. This is a great website in which I can write my experiences and vent, but personally, I need hugs, a shoulder, an ear....Your family will also feel blessed that they can help because after all, it's not them suffering the immediate pain. Don't worry about ruining anyone's Christmas. They will feel bad if you don't tell them. Trust me!

My husband didn't want anyone to know, and I respected his choice. I told a couple of prayer warriors from my church, but the rest of the time I had a poker face. He told the children a few days before the surgery. They were very supportive and ready to help even tough it didn't get to that.

It's important to put yourself in your husband's shoes too. It's his life. He needs to know he has a part in managing it and making decisions. That's what I would prefer if it was me.

I pray that God illuminates your lives and decisions at every step, amen.