Well thankyou all, I am beginning to feel so much better, I was worried that our 23 year marriage was being beaten into submission by this evil disease.Once,my husband told me that he was trying to make me hate him, so that I won't feel so bad if anything happens to him.That just about put me on the ropes. And to be honest, at one stage, I felt as if I could hate him because of the hurt and rejection. Incidently, he's never stopped working, and I really do see that he's on the mend. However, I'm not sure that I figure strongly in his plans for the future, as he's told me he wants to live out the rest of his life how he pleases, and do all the things he's never done.(I take it that's my fault...) I am on the back burner. The psychological impact of Cancer to me, is every bit as bad as the disease itself, and I feel in limbo. But even so, I am getting stronger too, and will accept whatever route in life he decides on, as it is after all, his life. No one told me it would be like this!!!! :rolleyes: