We will be meeting the doctor today. Hoping to have straight mind to think and makes fast decision. Option left now I think is surgery and chemo. But lets see. I slept and woke up.. still not feeling good at all.. I guess we all been through that...I know Ida is stronger than me in terms of fighting it.. I am just feeling more devastated from the actual patient!.. Crazy huh.. but seriously I felt like can I go through it if its me? No way..

I will update more on the doctor's suggestions... its just crazy to have to go through it again... the ride is not just bumpy.. but hell crazy.. I wish where I lived have this kind of support group.. too bad..

I am trying to keep myself busy with work,but still breaking down into pieces.. its very hard to keep calm as CG, to show you are strong, tough...having to decide for things, keeping life moving (dealing with daily stuff etc)..

I'm sure everyone went through it especially the caregivers.

Wish me luck guys...