@ Caco: That's the CG's battle! It is the patient's decision...all of it! We can try whatever we can to convince but the final choice is out of our hands. Best wishes to you and your dad in getting the best care at the best place for him!

If J's follow-up decision was mine and not J's, I wouldn't have to spend so much time in my "happy place".
But, sanity is a good thing. You have a firm grasp of the dynamic. As a CG, you are already ahead of the game.