It's been 2 1/2 months since treatment ended and I decided that my body was feeling healed enough for a massage - I've been yearning for one for some time but the thought of it made me feel a little vulnerable and frail. So today was the day and it was feeling so good...until...I rolled over onto my back, the massage therapist put the bolster under my knees and all of a sudden I was flat on my back on that damned radiation table!!! It took me a couple moments to even figure out why I was having a small freak out!!
I went on to enjoy the rest of the massage but it was a reminder that I will ALWAYS have reminders of cancer and my time in treatment. It's always going to be there - isn't it? Never far from the surface, just waiting to bubble up when you think you've stolen a moment of peace.

Thinking of you all at whatever point you are in this wild journey!