My parents are great- don't get me wrong, they have been there 100% for me through all of this. They moved my furniture into my house, kept up my yard all summer and my dad continues to shovel snow for me, they have been there for every appointment and surgery and are very loving and kind. The hard thing is that I have sort of stopped being an independent adult in their eyes and once more a very sick little kid, which is hard when you are used to having your own life.

I insisted that they take their vacation to Mexico despite my next surgery falling during that time for the reason that they have become so emeshed in my drama that they haven't had their own lives for a year now. I want them to go and enjoy themselves the best that they can and just try to get a break from this stuff with me. For once they are honoring my wishes which I am so grateful for! Caregivers get really tired and need a break too.

I'm going to go get some crispy cold sunshine, its something like 9 above outside here in beautiful northwest Montana- looks like a Christmas card.