Seth,

I m so sorry you are feeling so blue. It is a natural side effect of what has happened. Don't feel guilty or badly that you are having these feelings.

It doesn't matter that others have had it worse. Your experience is equally as traumatizing and the aftermath is often feeling depressed and sad- wondering "why the hell has this happened to me??" I think if you just allow yourself to feel what you are feeling you will be able to move forward. It is hard not to dwell on the negative.I think everyone here fights that tendency. I think you should rediscover what excites you in life and try and focus on that. Get out and meet new people and try new things and get your mind off of what you've been through. It certainly isn't easy but just try a few activities a week that move in that direction. I think that you will be pleasantly suprised at how much better you will feel. It becomes all consuming dealing with this illness- but you've survived it and you are going to live a long and happy life now. There is really only one way to think here no matter what the prognosis

Be open to new experiences. This disease doesn't have to define who you are as a person in life.

Wishing you all th ebest Seth. Go out and do something special for yourself today that makes you feel happy!

KATE