We are here. Feel free to vent, ask questions and share feelings. We have all been there and r emember those first "alone" days. First of all begin the process for Medicaid, with a diag. that should expediate the process. Others on here will respond and give you other recommendations regarding services when you have no Ins. Secondly, you will hopefully see from the many post, we are "survivors" and live good productive lives following treatment. Don't begin to think this is the end. There is good treatment available and you have to start thinking in terms of beating this! You have already begun the process by changing some of your habits, yea for you!