Thanks to both of you.
Because of Robs love affair with alcohol i moved back to my home in Yorkshire 6 years ago.Since then we have commuted every two to three weeks for long weekends and holidays i get to be near my Mum,,children and Grandchildren and we keep our marriage alive!! I talk to Robin every night for at least an hour and we look forward to seeing each other as often as possible.When he became ill i packed up and moved back down here to help and support him through what has been a horrendous time,and i wouldnt have it any other way.I suppose a little part of me hoped that this reality check would change everything and he would realise what a fool he has been and what the last 20 years have done to him.Unfortunately this didnt happen and some of the reason for that were all his years of drinking dont seem to have done any damage to his stomach or liver and apart from the cancer he was passed completely healthy in every other respect.So now he thinks he he doesnt have a problem.As for being enabled,i think the main reason i am here is because no one else would have done it.All his family and friends know what he is like and they would never have been able to handle it. I tell it like it is and he doesnt like it much but he has no choice but to listen. Wether he actually takes any of what i say on board i dont know.I just know i cant give up on him,not after we have come so far.The staff at the Cancer Centre know his problems and they have treated him very well but he sits and listens to everything they say,and then just goes and does his own thing.Then he pulls his head in and behaves like a model patient for a while. I suppose i am a bit like a battered wife i just keep coming back for more and i dont really know why.My Mum and kids are begging me to go home but i just cant do it.I know somewhere deep down he needs me and i wont go until i know he is safe and can manage.Not really his problem is it?