thank you all,when they put A on the steriod DAX....(CANT FIND MY NOTE BOOK WITH NAME)about 10 days before he started treatment he was sleeping 3hours a night,full of energy ,I jocked to my family that if he was a carpenter i could wake up and find i had a new kitchen,our family doctor is a friend and when A started to become unreasonable i asked did the strodides have this side effectand then found on the internet from others that they could make you angry ,aggressive etc and our doctor noticed that A was really not himself and spoke to his team at the hospital.A went really wild one morning told me i was f... hopless,and lots more and he wanted a divorce.I was in real shock especially as the first mounth we were so close and I was "the best wife",I had checked so much on the internet and found lots of usefull info and felt we were somewhat prepaired.A at this time was focusing on work and other projects he never had time for I think it was his way of dealing with the C ,however he was also meeting the speech th.,and all the rest of the team and taking on board all there advice and doing his jaw exercize .IF I questioned anything he would exploid and them i was told i would have to go for councling or he was leaving (I forgot to mention 2 days into the treatment he left for 2 nights and only because i begged him to com back all done by email as he would not talk on phone did he come back)now A is not talking to me again and he wants the number or reciepts from councilor to prove i am going.I sent the two boys over to hospital last night to wathch the football and my son said he was in fine form and he is comming home later today,I have emailed and texted and may have been smart but i have said i am there for him and will do all i can but i cannot try to change him and i am only responsible for my behaviour.I have spoken to my family who are calm and wise and they have told me to play along and it will pass I will now forget about the hurt and ask for forgiveness .I am sorry that I fell into the trap of feeling I had to stand up for myself this is not the time ,things keep changing and i will try to learn and be better.we are a very lucky family and always have been and A has a great attitude to this and we will get through this ,we have no choice anyway.
seana