#69206 02-03-2008 09:27 AM | Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 31 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | OP  Contributing Member (25+ posts)
Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 31 | I havne't posted much lately because this is mum's forum. I know a couple of you know, but I found out on New Years Day that my dad also has throat cancer.
We only met for the first time 4 years ago, and today I'm just feeling depressed. He is probably going to be ok, but I'm having a "why me" moment.
I just broke up with my husband and moved into my own apartment, both my parents are sick and on top of that I had a nasty accident while fileting a fish 3 weeks ago.
Yeah, I'm fishing for a little support today. It's only Feb 3rd, but it's been a horrible year already!
Mum - sick as a dog, see her sig.
Dad - diagnosed with throat cancer late 2007.
| | | | | Joined: Aug 2007 Posts: 1,301 "OCF Down Under" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | "OCF Down Under" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Aug 2007 Posts: 1,301 | You poor thing. What a time you are having of it. Sending you my support and hope that things start to look up. Hard to know what to say and "things can only get better" sounds a little glib but I hope they do  Cheers Gabe
History Leukoplakia bx 8/2006 SCC floor mouth T3N0M0- Verrucous Carcinoma.
14 hour 0p SCC-Right ND/excision/marginal mandibulectomy 9/2006, 4 teeth removed, flap from wrist, trach-ng 6 days- no chemo/rad.
6 ops and debulking (flap/tongue join) + bx's 2006-2012.
bx Jan 2012 Hyperkeratosis-Epithelial Dysplasia
24cm GIST tumour removed 8/2013. Indefinite Oral Chemo.
1/31/16 passed away peacefully surrounded by family
| | | | | Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 163 Senior Member (100+ posts) | | Senior Member (100+ posts)
Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 163 | Hang in there cutie... everyone is entitled to a blah moment.
If you are as strong a lady as your mum you will be OK. Just consider that marriage a "practice round".
And stay away from the fish knives for a while!
Marica
Caregiver to husband (Pete) Stage IV Base of Tongue. Dx 04 2003 Chemo/Radiation no surgery.. doing great!
| | | | | Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 | oh sue how awful I thought you and your husband had sorted things out.It must feel as if the world is falling in around you.
We had a similar scenario with Robins daughter,he only met her two years ago,when she 16 they barely got to know each other and he died .It was so sad.Perhaps it is time to think of being with the family for a holiday,although your mum told me it wasn't that easy for you to get away,sounds like you could do with some Mum size hugs.
love liz
Liz in the UK
Husband Robin aged 44 years Dx 8th Dec 2006 poorly differentiated SCC tongue with met to neck T1N2cM0 Surgery and Radiation.Finished TX April 2007
Recurrence June/07 died July 29th/07.
Never take your eye off the ball, it may just smack you in the mouth.
| | | | | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 5,260 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 5,260 | Man the cancer isn't bad enough with both parents, but you split with your man sure doesn't help. I split with mine after 5 yrs and it isn't much fun. But as they say, life goes on and if you have half of your moms spunk,, you will be fine. Let the fish market do your filleting from now on and just be the cook. I hope you had some duct tape LOL Come here and complain , vent or anyhing you call it, we will listen and try to make oyu smile.
Since posting this. UPMC, Pittsburgh, Oct 2011 until Jan. I averaged about 2 to 3 surgeries a week there. w Can't have jaw made as bone is deteroriating steaily that is left in jaw. Mersa is to blame. Feeding tube . Had trach for 4mos. Got it out April.
--- Passed away 5/14/14, will be greatly missed by everyone here
| | | | | Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 583 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 583 | I am so sorry to hear your bad news. You are really having a lot going on at the same time.
I can only imagine how your days go up and down and your heart is hurting so.
You need time to take all this in. I hope you have a good friend that you can talk to. Sorry about your marriage, I am sure that was not an easy decision.
I am sure you will find lots of information here that might help you deal with the double blow of your parents cancer. You are in my thoughts & prayers.
Take care,
Diane
2004 SCC R.tip 1/4 tongue Oct. 2005 R. Neck SCC cancer/Chemo Cisplatin 2x/8wks. Rad. Removed Jugular vein, Lymph gland & some neck muscle. TX finished 1/20/06... B.Cancer 3/29/07 Finished 6/07 Bi-op 7/15/09 SCC in-situ, laser surgery removed from 1st. sight. Right jaw replacement 11/3/14. 9 yrs cancer free as of Jan. 2015
| | | | | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 | This is now your site as well and you can have all the why me moments you want.
Talking and sharing is a very healthy way to cope with all the nasty stuff we have to deal with.
David
Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.
| | | | | Joined: Nov 2006 Posts: 2,671 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Nov 2006 Posts: 2,671 | Any kind of a break up is a tough thing to go thru and even more so when other health concerns get into the mix. Please do come back here anytime - there are some wonderful, knowledgeable, compassionate people here to help support you. And we do care about how things are going with you. My son went thru a rough time with his break-up but now he can smile and refer to his ex-wife as his "starter-wife". Try to think about all the things that can go right for your Dad and Mom and let us know what's happening with you.
Anne-Marie
CG to son, Paul (age 33, non-smoker) SCC Stage 2, Surgery 9/21/06, 1/6 tongue Rt.side removed, +48 lymph nodes neck. IMRTx28 completed 12/19/06. CT scan 7/8/10 Cancer-free! ("spot" on lung from scar tissue related to Pneumonia.)
| | | | | Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 681 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 681 | Sue,
Life is like riding a big ferris wheel that sometimes seems to be stuck in the mud but eventually it will turn and you will be back on top. You are blessed with a mother with a wonderful attitude and sense of humor. These same qualities should see you through any crisis.
This isn't just you"mum's forum" so keep in touch with us - nothing you are facing hasn't been faced by someone here.
Malka
SCC stage II Partial mandibulectomy w. neck dissection- July 2005. Renal cancer w. partial nephrectomy-Jan 2004. Breast cancer discovered in routine mammogram. Successful lumpectomy, sentinal nodes clear, RT only-2008 Reconstruction of mandible w fibula free flap-Jan 09. TORS removal of begnin pappiloma from esophagus-2010. Masectomy,rt breast 2013.
Support OCF
| | | | | Joined: May 2007 Posts: 632 "Above & Beyond" Member (300+ posts) | | "Above & Beyond" Member (300+ posts)
Joined: May 2007 Posts: 632 | Sue,
Do you have any information you could put into your signature line from us about your dad's cancer? Do you get updates from the rest of the family?
I know you're mainly like me--'I can co9pe if I know what's going on' which is why I've been straight with you from the off about what is happening with me and how I feel (okay, I might not have told the WHOLE truth about a little vacation in November--tee-hee!).
You are, right now, the daughter of 2 parents, both with cancer affecting their mouths, so you have as much right to 'be here' as anyone else in your position my love,
Love Momma xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Brenda in UK--Diagnosis 30/5/07--undifferentiated carcinoma in right jawbone and muscles. Stage 4
6/7/07--new diagnosis primary is in lung. Finished 4cycles of palliative carboplatin/gemcitabine
therapy September 07
Now dying to live!
| | |
| Forums23 Topics18,168 Posts196,927 Members13,104 | | Most Online458
Jan 16th, 2020 | | |
|
