David,

My sister and family live next door to us. We have been very close since our boys were born within months 30 years ago. I moved here from Texas to help her take care of my Mom. She is a closet smoker, at least around us...I never see her but I smell it in her car and garage.

She went thru the trauma of Bill's DX and treatment almost as intimately as I did. Also, a very close friend of hers is dying of lung cancer after years of chain smoking. Neither of these events have caused her to quit. I DON'T GET IT!

I told her once several years ago that I knew she smoked and I was worried about her and that I count not stand by and not say something...so I said it and then told her I would never lecture her again...that I knew it was her battle to fight.

I have not said anything since. It's hard and senseless and incomprehensible from a non-smoker's viewpoint. I love her and I am scared for her.

Deb