Thanks folks these are all really good ideas and I believe strongly in meditation and alternative methods...I thought that it was due to my husband's snoring but alas with him gone in the hospital the last couple of nights realized NOT it was me...I am happy to say they are releasing him today it wasn't a long stay this time we caught it so it didn't effect him. This is one thing off my mind but back to the snoring lmao....But he is home. I am going to try everything I can not to get involved in sleep meds...I am going to give up my evening coffee (which never used to bother me before), try a herbal tea, try maybe if it isn't too cold to take a walk, wow you folks keep talking about a "new normal" well this for me is definately taking hold...1. less coffee, If you knew me you would know how hard it is to give up my coffee...2...no smoking...that also was a huge part of my normal...this is still really hard cause they say there are so many benefits from quitting so I guess I am blind to them...the only benefit I can actually see right now is I don't have yellow fingers and can actually wear nail polish without it going yellow...huge difference lol but I am confident the benefits will start to show up soon...oh see thought of one other is the $$ and not having to make sure I take them with me or find a place to keep them my hands are free..but I am talking about big differences I am looking for...and I know the biggest is that my chances of reoccurance are lowered and that caused this in the first place...you would think that that would be enough and the fact that I am in this situation mostly because of smoking ...but I am slipping can feel i too much change at once

Ok so now who is rambling this is a side effect of no sleep!! anyway still one day at a time cause I am being honest I still want to smoke part of the addiction...guess that's why I haven't quit before..I feel I have been forced to quit cause the choices were well really no choice...I have to talk myself into quitting for my own good and for life... Day by Day