Thank you all for your responses and suggestions.

Here is a little more information on his situation. He has a PEG and hates it, especially when we were using it in conjunction with the pump. No matter what speed we had it on it seemed to make him vomit more than when we used the gravity-bag approach. As of the last week he is not using his PEG at all. He is trying to drink orally five Boost+ a day (360 calories a unit.) He is only drinking about 2 cups of water a day. He will not let me help in getting any water through his PEG. There's always an excuse - it's too late, it's too early, I need to sleep some more, I don't feel like testing myself right now, yada yada. He has been hydrated numerous times in the infusion room, but now will not let me make him an appointment because he doesn't like being lectured by the nurses - they are always encouraging him to drink more orally or use his PEG. He also will not even try pureed solid food or even things like milkshakes, smoothies, etc. He also has a lot of the same excuses in the book for that. He will only drink chocolate Boost+ and hates the other flavors, especially the vanilla. As I understand, the Carnation product is vanilla flavored. He wouldn't even try it. Even when he makes five Boosts a day he is not getting enough calories and certainly not enough water to heal. The doctors, nurses and dieticians have all told him this, but he refuses to do what he needs to do to get well.

He complains about the awful phlegm, but won't take in water to help break it up and is only rinsing his mouth with H20/baking soda/salt maybe twice a day. I don't know when the last time he brushed his teeth - his breath is terrible.

He does take Reglan to help nourishment stay south, so to speak.

It's like he is hiding out in our upstairs bedroom 22 hours a day. I don't think he will see a counselor, but I will ask tomorrow. I have been going to a caregiver support group for two weeks.

Im afraid I got a little angry this evening. I did tell him that I will not bring the Boost upstairs to him anymore. He will need to come downstairs and get it himself. Also, if he wants me to continue doling out his meds he will need to do some of the other things I ask, mainly taking more water orally or through the tube and increasing the walking. Nothing too strenuous or difficult. I realize that it may seem strenuous for him right now but I do not want to be the 'nurse' who is enabling him to wind up in the hospital.

I guess what I am trying to say is that,from my perspective, he is being a butthead. I know he feels like crap, but everyone has told him he will continue to feel like crap if he continues the path he is on. I am willing to help him, but I don't know how long to put up with this behavior without getting seriously worried.

This turned out to be more than a little information. Thanks for 'listening'.

Kendall