Claudia,

I just finished very similar treatment to your husband's. My mouth and throat are all torn up, my neck is stiff and sore and I feel a little like I was hit by a freight train. Healing from this ordeal is going to take some time! The program where I'm being treated, Dana-Farber in Boston, has an excellent speech/swallow therapist who specializes in Head and Neck cancer patients, so I would absolutely agree with finding one for your husband. I suspect it will make a huge difference.
I think if you go through the forum posts here, you'll see that almost everyone here has been pushed to the edge during treatment and almost all of them have returned to eating almost normally. Not everyone, but a pretty large percentage. It is going to take time, and a certain amount of discipline, but he and I (!) will get there!