Carol,
I think one of the reasons you are not getting too many responses is very few people choose that option and most of their caregivers leave the board after it is over. Thus if you are PMing them, they may never see it, nor can one reply to a PM without signing onto the board. Better you should email them.

There is a thread called 'Refused all Treatment' by Paul R, who happens to be my boss, in the Anger and Coping section page 4. I now see that Liz emailed it to you. Paul has rarely been on the board since his mother died so do not PM him. However, you might try emailing him and I think he will respond. His Mom was only 71 when diagnosed, had several other medical issues, but was a fiesty lady to the end. She lived a year and 1/4 and went quickly at the end. Most are not that lucky from what I read on the board. There are other stories of the final days in the blog sections. Read Liz's, Amy's, Rosie's,and I believe Rick's. While these peoples relatives did not refuse treatement, they did not make it.

Keep us posted on what the dr says and do lots of reading on the board.

Take care,
Eileen