Hi, Lisa, Having gotten through what should have been John's 65th birthday last August, Thanksgiving, our 15th wedding anniversary Nov. 29th, Christmas, New Years and soon to be the 1st anniversary of his passing, I can only tell you that you get through losing someone you love by sheer determination and gritting your teeth. Everyone is telling me the "1st year is the hardest"-well, we'll see. I am fortunate to have grandkids, good friends and work to keep me propped up. I hope that you find what you need to prop you up! You have to find meaningful ways to fill the void until that void transforms into a beautiful memory in your life. Amy in the Ozarks