Lisa, I'm so deeply sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what I would have felt like if I had had to lose my husband so soon after we were married.

As is true with dealing with cancer treatments and the recovery from them, I think dealing with grief and recovery from it is different for everyone. Please feel free to come here whenever you need to to talk about your feelings and don't be shy to share them with your friends and family too. There are also greif support groups in some cities, grief counselors and most ministers, rabbis, etc. are trained to counsel those who are grieving. No one can bear your pain for you, though they may wish they could as much as you wished you could bear your husband's pain at times, but you don't have to walk the path you are on alone.

Nelie