Tim,

You and I are very close in terms of tx and as we progress along our post treatment differences will diminish with time.

I really don't find myself dwelling to much on my future with cancer. I will deal with whatever comes my way just as my wife and I have so far. Knowing now what we have been through I hope and pray that we don't have to be faced with a reoccurance but I don't think it's much in our control. I stopped smoking over 30 years ago and was a social drinker. I have been faithfully married for the last 16 years so I don't think I controlled getting my cancer in the first place.

Sometimes when I start to feel like "why me", I just think about all the children who are dealing with cancer or other life threatening diseases. At least I had 58 years of a normal healthy life. There are also many others here on this site that have had it much worse than you and I and they are dealing with it. I also don't have to go far to hear about so many people dieing every day and as bad as it might seem to us, we are still hear to complain about our problems.

Others have said it and I feel it as well, my outlook on life has changed since I felt close to death. It's only because of death that we hold life important and every day I get to see life in this different way I feel grateful.

Focus on healing your body and your family. Make every day count towards something positive and you won't have room for those negative thoughts.

JMHO,

David

Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.