Thanks for the replies everyone . . . everything is always helpful .
Honestly, I can't say that I was thrilled at what my physicians had to say, Fran. Frankly I was neutral. But that I know is the intellect in me. We are looking at things at a cellular level, so even an MRI or PET scan wouldn't provide me with total comfort at this stage. I guess that in my case, what it amounted to was "no news" and "no news" to me is just that. No news. It isn't necessarily good news.
Also, Fran, this isn't my first battle for my life. The cancer is now my fourth in 10 years. Once one gets placed under control, the next crops up. I'm tired of it . . .
While the others haven't been cancer, they have, in their own right, been equally deadly. And the one thing that I have noted in my own successes and the successes of others is that comparisons to others is not a good idea. It is your disease marked by your beautiful particularities . . . all of the little things that really make you who you are . . . so your fight gets to be fought on your turf on your terms!
The other thing that kind of adds to it is that with the rather minor side effects and my apparent quick recovery even from those, most of the people around me in support roles seem to have adopted an attitude of "this is over", "crisis passed", "problem solved". We all know that isn't really true, so it makes things a bit lonely.
I guess the good news is that I am not sleep deprived.
But I can't say that I am typical in any of this. When I started I was told I would lose 20 to 40 pounds. I gained 15. I was told that it would be months to get my taste back. Wrong again, it was partially back in about 10 days and getting better every hour. Where I lost my hair from radiation. Again 6 months to begin growing back and 2 weeks later, it is coming back . . . white blond instead of brown. I'll look like a punk rocker!!
Etc., etc., etc. . .
To answer your question, Kirk, I found out in a physical. This year I turned 40 and last year, anticipating this, I decided that I would get a bunch of things in order in my life. Since I race sports cars I figured that health insurance would be good (I am a contractor and don't belong to a group plan). I also figured that with health insurance, I would get a physical, etc., etc. Well, it took about 6 months to finally get the write policy (July of 04) because I was either out of area or forgot to sign a form at the right place, etc. Anyway, in August of 04 I finally had a plan.
In Late Sept or early Oct, either right before or during vacation, I felt something in my throat. It didn't hurt, so I didn't think infection. It was uncomfortable. It felt like a piece of lettuce lodged there. It came and went so it didn't seem pressing. I got back from vacation about Nov. 1 and that following week I made an appointment to get a physical on the 7th of Dec.
By this point, I figured there was something wrong in my throat, but didn't think cancer and was getting a physical. I didn't worry.
December 7th rolled around and my GP looked in my throat and said "You have a problem. Go get an x-ray and a CAT scan. Today. And here's a referral to an ENT" And literally he was that instantaneous about it. No waffling, no uncertainty, just go!
So I went. The X-ray was clear as was that CAT. The ENT (I eventually decided he was a quack) did a small biopsy (14th of Dec.), the results (21st of Dec.) were SCC, right tonsil, in situ, risk of invasion present. In a couple days I had been in contact with a fairly prominent critical care physician who himself had just celebrated 2.5 years post-treatment (Stage IV) and he referred me to my team (not affiliated with his hospital).
The new biopsy and PET scan showed T2 (again in situ) with one hot node. My Tumour Board felt it best, with the hot node, to treat the primary tumour as invasive (subsequent pathology showed there was some invasion).
40 Radiation treatments and 8 chemo later, here I am.
A decision is to be made sometime between April and June as to whether a neck dissection is necessary or mere an advised option. Today I am not up for that decision.
