Brian,
Your situation sounds alot like my sister Marcy's.
Her first surgery was January 03, resection of tongue and lymph nodes. One node positive and they told us they didn't recommend radiation. If only we could turn back time and have tried the radiation right away. In June she had a recurrance in her neck and submental area. Then they recommended radiation and chemo. After this she had a radical neck dissection. 2 months later the tumors recurred in the neck, face, and also skull mets and c1 mets. She was in such horrible pain. Her tumors are continuing to grow so fast it doesn't even seem possible. She also got the pneuomonia last week and had to be admitted for 2 weeks. She received the Gamma knife for her bone mets and now they are going to do IMRT for the tumors in the face and neck. Is this what your friend is receiving. They want to try and shrink the tumors so she has longer to live and less pain. She is on a morphine pump at my mom's and still in alot of pain. I don't know how much more of this she can take. Watching this pain in my beautiful little sister is heart wrenching, she is only 32 and has a beautiful 4 year old daughter. We continue to pray hoping God will change his mind and let her stay with us.

God Bless you,
Michelle