Tami, it appears that you are very invested in your mom's well being. (I can relate) Can you bring your kids down there temporarily? Do you have other family where you live that could maybe stay with them? I stopped my life to help my dad. I was so scared-in fact, I took an unpaid FMLA leave. My hubby and I have made it and now my dad is DONE. A temporary glitch in life could work out. Of course, I don't know your situation at all, I'm just throwing things out there. Your mom's non-compliance is a definite barrier to survival and recouperation. I am so sorry, I could not imagine going through this. Would she come to you?? I brought my dad kicking and screaming to my place--Uggggh, poor thing.