Hi Stephany,
Anybody who chews or uses tobacco everyday is a fool. My dentist could easily see my 6x3cm tonsil tumor (which was practically choking me to death) and didn't know what it was, so you can draw your own conclusions about the Dx ability of dentists. Even oral surgeons and MD's often miss it. Diagnosis of oral cancer is a specialty. Tell your friend to do a search of all the terrified tobacco chewers and dippers here and show it to her husband. Some of our earlist members have been tobacco chewers (and many of them in their 30's). Then get him to a competent ENT or Head and Neck surgeon for a biopsy. If he's not willing to do this then at least maybe he can fill out his advanced directives and get a living trust.

About your Mom, many of us here has been cured with radiation and/or chemo only. It is no walk in the park. Many recommend radiation after surgery as a precautionary measure anyway.