I made it to Vermont, where I will care for my sister Barbara for the next few weeks while she finishes 6 weeks of cysplatin chemo and radiation. The biggest worry I had was seeing her and her body and all the mutilations and disfigurments caused by her surgeries. Its done. We had some tears and held each other like little children. Her spirit is enormous, then I wonder if she is just not able to let go and be sick and let others care for her. She doesn't want to slow down, doesn't want to let us help her as much as she really needs us to help her. My biggest concern at this moment is the scaring on her arm, where they took the tissue to replace the tongue. It is the worst looking scaring I have ever seen. Also she leaves it open, unbandaged, and It seems so delicate, I worry that she will injure her arm, not having it wrapped or something ? She also is dealing with the Thrush right now, and didnt want to take anymore medicine for it. But we convinced her to, and also have some manuka honey coming from a friend in New Zealand to help combat mouth problems during the radiation. Her throat is becoming sore also. Yet no sores in the mouth. I'm not sure what to do to just simply comfort her. She likes to be touched and held. Yet she hurts all over. I sit next to her and rub her arm, and almost cuddle her ... for the first time in a long time, I feel like we are little girls now, sisters, not grown women 46 and 51. I so want her to get through this and be ok. Anyway ... I'm here and will be keeping you all posted as to how we are doing ... my introduction to the cancer center in Dartmouth, NH will be tomorrow. I'm praying a lot that it won't get much tougher for her. My heart tells me it most likely will get tougher, but I'm determined to keep her spirit strong...

Betty